Posted by Adam

Thursday July 25, 2013

LEA Michele is worried no one will love her as much as her tragic boyfriend, Cory Monteith.

The actress was left devastated when  Monteith was found dead in his Vancouver hotel room on July 13 — and she now fears she’ll never be cared for in the same was as Cory cared for her.

“She is numb,” a source said.

”It still doesn’t feel real for her and she’s just taking it day by day, minute by minute.

“The nighttime is when it’s really difficult. Everyone’s [made up] their schedules so there’s always someone there with her.

“It’s been like a horror movie, watching Lea crumble. She’s always been so positive and happy, always smiling. Now her face is totally swollen from crying. She wavers between sitting down and writing a eulogy to sing at his memorial to total denial.

“She feels like she may never find someone to love her the way Cory did. She runs scenarios over and over again in her head, trying to figure out, could she have helped him? Could she have saved him?

“Lea has no idea how she’s ever going to go back to work, let alone sing on stage without Cory.”

Meanwhile, Lea has been reaching out to friends of Cory’s , trying to learn exactly what triggered her tragic boyfriend’s relapse into drug abuse that led to his fatal overdose of alcohol and heroin July 13.

“Lea is trying to talk to the people who last saw him,” an insider tells US Weekly. “She wants to know what happened, she wants to understand.”

Monteith entered a rehab facility this past spring.

“Lea long knew about Cory’s drug problems and was always pushing him to get help, [as] she believed he’d be unstoppable if he could beat his demons,” added the pal.

“Lea hasn’t been in communication with a lot of people. Her Glee castmates are giving her space at this time, as they know that she needs to be by herself.

“She’s only talking to a few confidantes. She’s in no state to be seen in public.

“She’s destroyed, completely devastated. She’s a wreck. There are so many emotions.”

Monteith, who played the role of Finn Hudson on the Fox hit, was found dead at 31 July 13 in a room at Vancouver, British Columbia’s Fairmont Pacific Rim Hotel.

Tags: cory monteith, lea michele